Alcohol didn’t serve me as I’d hoped it would. Why didn’t I become a skinny, sophisticated socialite when I had a few glasses of champagne? The ads said I would! I’d end the night looking like a half dressed rat, not Cinderella. When I started to want better, I started to get better. Then I started to attract better. It had to start somewhere. And I had to start sober. Happy Tuesday, sober family! Keep it simple today.
Nail that door shut. Add some chains and a two by four and don’t open it. No matter what. At least that’s what we did. We surrendered to the fact that we can’t drink successfully. It’s not normal to have a bottle or two of wine every night, no matter who says it is. It’s not conducive to being a good mom, daughter, partner, or friend to have 6 mimosas at brunch. And for those who push it? It’s time to glide on by these friends. Put you first this week. You’ll be amazed at how amazing you are. Happy Monday, sober family! Keep it simple today.
Black Friday…the day to shop when you didn’t even know you “needed” what you’re buying. This year I have a bit more money than I’ve had in the past, mostly because I don’t spend hundreds a month on alcohol. Most of my Black Fridays in the past have started with a black cloud of dread hanging over me because of things I’d done or said at Thanksgiving the day before. The nausea, anxiety, and dread were no joke. People stopped inviting me to do things on this day. They knew how I’d be feeling. So I’d hide and think of the unfairness of my life. I’d think “they’d drink like this too if they had my problems”. Little did I realize that the problems mostly stemmed from my drinking. The ones that don’t can be dealt with. Sober. We’re a force to be reckoned with when we’re not drowning in alcohol and guilt. So enjoy your day, sober family! Happy Friday! Keep it simple today.
I’d send myself a text, write a note, even email myself where I’d hid the rest of my booze (a rare occurrence) so I’d know where it was the next day. I’d give myself props because I knew that I’d have forgotten where it was in a blackout. Who was I hiding it from? Everyone who loved me. I wasn’t hiding a thing from anyone though. People know what we’re doing; they get tired of repeating themselves. Each and every time I found those bottles from reading my unintelligible notes I’d find that there was always just a swig left. That was enough to get me going. I’d also be so proud of myself that I’d left even a little. See?! I don’t have a problem! I didn’t finish the whole thing! Oh well yeah – I did have to decipher what I’d written because it looked like my dog had written it – but still! Look at my self control! My self has zero control once I start. Better to leave it alone. I don’t have the energy for figuring out hiding places anymore. I’ll leave that to the kids searching for their Christmas presents. Happy Monday, sober family! Keep it simple today.
I don’t know about anyone else, but my anxiety doesn’t need any more feeding. Not even a nibble. If I drank to relax and unwind, I’d be anxious and wound the next day. It didn’t help to have the shamesies too. I spent YEARS living in the purgatory of drunk, hungover, anxious, depressed. You’d think I’d figure out that the anxiety was much worse after drinking. I knew it but when I don’t want to know something I just pretend I don’t. Just take it from me – it doesn’t work. As my sister says, I’d rather stop drinking and be uncomfortable for a while than spend my life in purgatory. And when there was proof of my debauchery? Like skinned knees or a stitched chin or alcohol seeping from my pores? I burrowed under my covers and tried to hide. Some things are too persistent to hide from, though. So happy Sunday, sober family! We hope you’re living your dreams today. Just remember, don’t drink like my sister and keep it simple today.